Dear Lord, There's a whole lotta text on this thing.

Here is a picture of a puppy.

No Fiddy Cent for Australia

Apparently 50 Cent's new game is too violent for us lily-white Australians. Boo wah.

One of these days the OFLC is going to ban a good game, and then I'll be really ticked off. I've already got some small amount of sand in my vagina about the absence of an R rating for videogames, especially since they've gone and made a whole song and dance about using "the same system" for both films and videogames, even though the ratings system for videogames tops out at 15+.

All the arguments in favour of this system seem to fall into "games are worse because they're interactive" and/or "games are worse because they're for kids", neither of which actually hold terribly much water. There's this huge outcry because kids somehow manage to get their hands on games meant for adults - yet I don't understand how this is any different from kids getting their hands on pornographic movies, or booze, or a whole bunch of other stuff meant for adults, as they always have and probably always will. But we still let adults watch all sorts of offensive garbage, and drink booze and smoke cigarettes - we give them the choice. Which is nice. Why videogames need to be treated so differently is beyond me - I honestly think that the only reason this is the case is because the people creating and voting on this legislation simply can't imagine a videogame that's not for kids.

That all said, companies like Rockstar are not helping. Making a game that's rightly rated for adults, but marketing it squarely at kids (and arguably intending it for them all along) isn't right, and they've generated a lot of bad press as a result of their tactics. But to assume that the whole industry is like Rockstar is just plain wrong. There really ought to be a market for games with all sorts of content, labelled clearly, and sold the same way R-rated movies, booze and cigarettes are - in a way that ensures that they only reach the audience for which they are intended. Of course some kids will get hold of things they shouldn't - but does that mean that we should restrict the availability of those things to those for whom they're intended?

Most people would say "obviously not", when asked about things like champagne and artsy movies where you get to see the occasional pair of boobs. But not in regard to videogames. Here are the things that need to happen, to change that:

1. The clowns at Rockstar need to pull their heads in.

2. The rest of us need to make at least some games that are more serious, possess more artistic merit and are more clearly defensible as pieces of creative expression, rather than just lightweight entertainment. Games where things like violence and sex are contextualised, and contribute to the whole, rather than crudely cobbling them on simply for shock value and adolescent giggles or wish-fulfilment.

OR

3. We can wait until the people making these laws are the people who grew up playing videogames.

The change will come at some point. I reckon we can accelerate that by making games that can be seen as a geniune part of our culture by a larger audience than the enthusiast fanbase most games are currently reaching. Or, we can just wait until the legislators are people for whom Super Mario Bros. actually is a part of their culture. It'll happen. Either way, I think the current pack of knuckleheads at the OFLC will be taken about as seriously as the wowsers who tried to ban Elvis waggling his hips on the TV, when we look back at this.

Nerds, and Nerd Stuff

I think I mentioned this before, so I may as well follow up on it - here is the report from the "Show and Tell" meeting we had a couple of weeks ago. It was pretty fun. I'm buying a copy of "Renegade RX" once it's out, by the way - it was a hoot.

Apparently Not Made Up

At the risk of turning this blog into "stupid shit I find on the Internet each day", I can't help but comment on this apparently genuine piece of Idaho state legislature. It kind of makes me want to visit, whereas that other film about Idaho had the opposite effect.

Fridge Magnet Poetry Spam

Here's a message I received this morning:

"sudden truly calling, beautiful busy completely evening familiar? word goodbye getting.
side light next. pretty wife awhile between.
comes corner his motor proud drew? end fly similar, gotten hard miles quietly degree,
keeping idea keeping. wine respect planning possible longer.
turn social convenient science,"

Isn't that quite something? I'm used to being offered cheap software, a bigger willy, a chance to help out some poor Nigerian bastard and all that, and winning a few major European lotteries each day before breakfast, so a bit of poetry is certainly a pleasant change of pace. Thanks fzkhtb3edh@sinclair.net, you made my morning.

I almost feel a bit bad that Google filtered it as "spam", to be honest. I mean - sure there's a malicious executable attached to it, but there's a piece of someone's soul, also. That's gotta count for something.

Bloody Google

Google Desktop and its magical sidebar is a little wonder, but I'll be damned if it doesn't keep spoiling the football scores for me. Don't they know that we have to watch a delayed telecast here?!

To other Google Desktop users who have to watch delayed telecasts of your favourite sports: please learn from my mistakes, and keep the "news" pane minimised on game day.

Oh, and HAPPY THANKSGIVING all you seppos! Have some turducken for me.

I promise...

...this will make your day.

Dear Friends

I'm not accepting your invites to any more social networking websites. It's nothing personal.

I've signed up for Friendster and Orkut, and about six others that may or may not still exist. I am bombarded with reminders each time every one of you has a birthday, moves, changes your phone number, or says something to each other. It's not that I don't love you - I still have room in my heart... just not in my inbox.

What's a "scrobbler" anyway?

Are you interested in what I'm listening to? Didn't think so.

But you should check out Audioscrobbler / Last.fm all the same. It's pretty neat. By all means add me as a "friend", even if I'm not.

Football

It's been a good year for football.

I won some money in the AFL tipping competition this year, and missed picking the grand final margin by a single point, despite the fact that it was my first year being involved in it, and that I have absolutely no idea about Aussie Rules. Beginner's luck can be a beautiful thing.

What's more, in proper football, Australia qualified for the World Cup for the first time in my lifetime. Which will make next year's event even more interesting than usual. Mark Schwarzer, you're a bloody legend. I'm not sure I've ever seen a city spontaneously erupt quite like it did when John Aloisi's penalty kick hit the back of the net. I shouted and had my hands in the air, without even meaning to - sort of like when you kick your leg after getting whacked on the knee with that little hammer thing.

And I've actually been able to watch an unprecedented amount of my favourite kind of football this year - the NFL. It's the first NFL season for which we've had cable, and between Fox Sports and ESPN, I can usually watch 3 or 4 games a week. Which isn't bad, really, considering that for the last few years, all I've been able to watch was the Superbowl and the occasional highlight.

I've been a big fan of the Eagles in the last few years, partly because I'm fan of some of their players (particularly Donovan McNabb), but also because they're the "local team" of my missus. It's always best to have even a tenuous geographical tie with a team you're going to support, I reckon. But, as is typical, since I've been able to actually watch them in action, I've seen them play five times (Superbowl XXXIX and four regular season games this year) - and they've lost every game I've watched. Boo. Last week's loss to the Cowboys was particularly heartbreaking. They dominated for 56 minutes or so, only to literally throw it away, getting McNabb injured in the process. I put a tape in this morning so that I could watch the Eagles/Giants game when I got home, but Google Sidebar has just spoiled the result for me. I guess it was just trying to be helpful. In fact, it's probably better that I didn't watch. In any case, they're still having a bad year, and are currently the worst team in the NFC East. I don't know if it's the "Madden Curse", but it's not real good. Still, I guess it could be worse.

At the start of the season, I said that I thought Superbowl XL would be Giants vs. Colts (i.e. Manning vs. Manning). I stand by that prediction, and it's a matchup I'd love to see, if the Eagles aren't going to be around in the post-season.

Apologies

Okay, well, that's sorted out. I suppose when you leave something alone for long enough, it's bound to fall apart on you. The blog seems to be working properly again now, though I've had to use a new template, and I don't think I like it as much as the old one. It's a shame that:

a) There aren't a few more to choose from, and
b) I can't be bothered learning a bit of HTML.

Ah well, them's the breaks, eh?

For Pete's Sake...

Why is there a big bloody space before that last post? Dagnammit.

Long Time Between Drinks

Well, what do you know? Here we are again.

I'm going to have another go at this, but with a few differences. See if you can spot them.

First thing I want to say: I've no idea where this year has gone.

Actually, that's a complete lie. I know exactly where most of it has gone - I spent most of it in the office, working on a SpongeBob SquarePants game for the Nintendo DS. Since emerging from that death march, I've been in a somewhat dazed state, filled with half-arsed ideas about how to change my life for the better in various ways. This has involved:

1. Buying some plants, and attempting to look after them.
2. Attempting to cook more often, and in different ways.
3. Making myself shamble, puff and wheeze around the park every once in a while, in a gross mockery of exercise, wearing entirely the wrong sort of socks.

There's a whole bunch of stuff going on at work now, to fill the void that follows on from the end of a major project. It's taking up at least 6 of the 10% of the brain that I supposedly actually use, but I'm not going to talk about it, since a) I probably shouldn't, and b) it's not very interesting.

I'm also going through the customary nearly-the-end-of-the-year process of self-indulgent doubt and uncertainty. I'm wasting my life; I'm in the wrong job; I'm not doing anything worthwhile - that sort of thing. I'm not actually particularly unhappy or anything - I thoroughly enjoy my work for the most part, as a matter of fact. It's just a bit pointless, is all.

In addition to the usual treadmill, I've done a few extracurricular, semi-work-related things lately. We had a pretty good IGDA meeting last week, where local boffins kindly brought their projects along for us all to take a gawp at. Many of them were absolutely brilliant. I'm not sure if it's impolite to say I was surprised, but here goes: I was surprised.

HOWEVER... as impressed as I was with the quality and quantity of what was shown, and with the passion and professionalism of these independent and student development teams, what always worries me about these events is how derivative everything is. I'd like to think that, given my druthers, I'd want to spend my time working on something refreshing and new. But these talented, driven groups of people, who can literally work on ANYTHING... end up making Zelda, or Ikaruga, or Worms, or whatever. There's plenty of time for that once you get into the games industry proper - we've got plagiarism down to an art. But when you're doing your own thing... why not actually do your own thing, and experiment a little? Very few people actually do. I don't get it.

I also spoke in a discussion panel on storytelling in games. As you can tell by the website I've linked, I wasn't their first choice for a speaker. But someone pulled out, and I guess they know that I'm always prepared to walk into a room and voice my opinions at a bunch of strangers, no matter how short the notice. And I'll admit that I do take pleasure in doing so, despite the fact that I always feel a bit of a phony when I have to pretend to be some sort of "expert". I think it went alright.

I've been playing Mario Kart on the Nintendo DS over the weekend. I'll leave the reviewing to others - they're pretty much in unison anyway. I will say two specific things about it, though:

1. It's a perfect example of "if it ain't broke...". There's nothing here that will surprise fans of the series, but nothing that will disappoint them, either. For once, adding WiFi multiplayer and making it portable actually IS enough.

2. There are no stupid touch-screen controls. The game doesn't need them, and I'm thrilled that they had the courage to stick with what works. The touch screen is used to input text sometimes (like when you have to enter your WEP key), and to draw a logo for your cart - and that's it. Awesome. Hopefully Nintendo's lead in this department will mean that the rest of us won't have to add gimmicky touch-screen controls purely for the sake of being able to say that we have them, where they don't fit at all. Phew!

It's also another reason that it's a great time to own a DS. A year ago, it looked like it might have been a bit of a turkey, but a steady stream of amazing software has made it the one gadget you've really got to carry with you at all times. The PSP is still mighty pretty, but it's also still awaiting its true killer-app, as far as this little black duck is concerned.

What else? Oh yeah. I'm also indulging myself in the traditional end of year "start a bunch of side projects I'll probably never spend more than an hour on" thing. I've got some initial notes for all sorts of overly-ambitious nonsense. If they ever progress to anything much beyond that, I'll post the results here, I promise.

I'm getting some lunch. In the meanwhile, read Honey's blog. It's a pleasure to read, and thoroughly educational, to boot. Tell her I sent you.